last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
Randomize
