Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
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