So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
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