a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
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