So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
