I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Randomize
