whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
The cops high fived after they tackled you
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