he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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