I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
Shame - the story of my life.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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