I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
Alive.
So much puke
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Randomize
