i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
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