Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Randomize
