who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
