Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Randomize