No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
Randomize
