So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
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