we have officially lost it.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Randomize