she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
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I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
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is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.