Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
Randomize
