Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
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