I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Randomize
