at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
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