Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
Randomize
