it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
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