hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
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