Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
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