I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
We need to feng shui this bitch.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
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