but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
