she was so not down for the gang bang
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Randomize
