they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
Randomize
