I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
