I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
