are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
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