Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
Randomize