Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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