Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize