i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
Randomize
