evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
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