it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die?
I hope so
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Randomize
