I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
Randomize
