i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
No more Irish car bombs ever.
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
Randomize
