At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Randomize
