Soap is not a condiment
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
Randomize
