I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
I want her autograph on my taint
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
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