we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Randomize