No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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