Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
