THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
