I bet he comes in French.
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Randomize
