She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
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