also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
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