dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
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